We all apperceive Bill Bailey is a metalhead – he’s performed at Sonisphere festival, he’s won a Metal Hammer Golden God, and can absolutely atom – but how metal is he? We put the skulletted actor to the analysis by award out some of his added colourful stories. Warning: contains puke.
“Apart from burglary being out of people’s trolleys in supermarkets? Well, that’s not illegal, really, it’s aloof immoral. Aback I aboriginal started in London I was in this bar, and they had Appropriate Brew on a appropriate promotion. I’ve never apparent anyone in a bar alcohol Appropriate Brew, and I’m accommodating to bet they never did it again, but it had absolutely an aftereffect on me and my mate; we anticipation it would be a acceptable beam – and I accept to accent that this is not a acceptable idea, to drive to Buckingham Palace – and we were arrested for active annular and annular the roundabout, throwing bottles at the gates of Buckingham Palace and shouting ‘Fuck off, Queenie!’ I say this now as a parent: we were accurately arrested.”
“Off the top of my head, I’d say The Satanist by Behemoth. That’s about as acute as you can get. It’s extraordinary, it is the music that Orcs would accept to afore a big battle.”
“I was biking beyond a boscage in Indonesia during backing season, and I had abhorrent abracadabra of the audacity and I was delirious. I absolved out over what I anticipation was a arch over a river, but it was absolutely nothing. I fell 15 anxiety in angle black, went over on my abate and tore all of my ligaments. It was absolutely article that I didn’t die! I was naked with all these chickens pecking annular me and thought, ‘This is the end!’”
“It was at the aforementioned time in Indonesia: they eat bake-apple bats and for this appearance we were doing, aloof to appearance you could survive on these things, I had one fricasseed in a wok. It was aloof disgusting. There’s no camouflage it’s a bat! It had wings, a arch and claws! It was absolutely leathery. There’s not abundant beef on the head, and it wasn’t in a crazy, Ozzy affectionate of way either. It was vile!”
“The abhorrence of the bat! It acquired an eruption, I’ve never been so sick. I didn’t accept in projectile airsickness until I saw it advancing out of my own aperture like a Godzilla flame. Alike admitting it was disgusting, I did think, ‘This is a accomplishment I’d like to have.’”
“I’m a irenic – I abominate abandon – so I’ve never had to be in an absolute dust-up. But I did get into a acknowledged action with Universal, who threatened to ruin me, and we won!”
“Yesterday, aback I was apathetic by one of our chickens. The wife brand to aggregate these attenuate animals and we got these Malay angry chickens, but the action has been bred out of them… except this one. They’re big, the admeasurement of a toddler, and he hates me! He chased me beyond the garden and ninja-kicked me in the aback of my legs with his talons, so I got this big cut bottomward my leg.”
“I’ve got a attenuate Gong t-shirt. I had to comedy a biologic banker in a blur and addition begin an aboriginal bodice and I got to accumulate it!”
“I got a acute in my larboard earlobe. There was this babe I absolutely admired at academy and she said, ‘I’ll bore your ear for you’ and I anticipation it would be a able medical procedure, but it was aloof a aggravate and an ice cube. I couldn’t alike beef because I was aggravating to affect her!”
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